Wednesday, June 24, 2009

And the power behind the orange rings is ... BILLY MAYS!

And here I used to think the Blue Lanterns were hilarious.

Well, okay, they're STILL hilarious, but thanks to Green Lantern #42, now I think the Orange Lantern(s) is MORE hilarious. Spoilers ahoy!

In the previous issue, Larfleeze chopped off Hal's hand in order to get the blue ring. In THIS issue, upon donning the blue ring, Larfleeze all of a sudden doesn't feel hungry anymore! However, that nice feeling proves to be fleeting, as the blue ring decides it likes Hal better and swiftly makes its way back to Hal -- and reattaches his hand, blue ring and all. Then Hal and Larfleeze get in a big ol' fight, and Hal decides, hey, maybe Larfleeze will lose his power if Hal can get his orange power battery away from him. Hal succeeds in getting ahold of the orange power battery -- and lo and behold, it starts talking to him like Billy Mays from an Orange Glo infomercial (click on the image to enlarge it for reading):

"Call today and you'll receive a 32-ounce bottle of original Orange Glo for the low, low price of $19.99! Plus we'll include this handy cleaning bucket ABSOLUTELY FREE! You get it all! Here's how to order!"

It's Billy Mays, I tell ya! The Green Lanterns have Ion, the Sinestro Corps have Parallax, and for the Orange Lantern(s) it's Billy Mays. (Either that, or the orange power battery is channeling classic game show host Bob Barker.)

As if that isn't funny enough ... I've been saying all along that the only thing Hal has to do to get rid of the blue ring once and for all is hope for something simple, like getting laid or just wishing for the blue ring to shut up and go away. Well, wouldn't you know it--!

"--I hope you stop asking me that question!"

And the blue ring says, essentially, "OKEE DOKEE!"

Hee, hee, hee, hee, hee, hee, hee! Stupid Blue Lanterns. Power rings have always accepted orders very literally, but this really takes the cake.

John Stewart isn't exempt from the fun. There's nothing like getting a big ol' smooth from an extremely dangerous arch enemy, even if she IS a cute girl:

Man, Fatality has DEFINITELY been brainwashed by the Star Sapphires. DEFINITELY. Still, John's experience with getting a little super-villain love is so far better than what Hal usually goes through.

And then there's THIS:

I could be wrong, but I do believe that's the first time in Green Lantern history that Hal's actually been whacked in the head with a power battery.

Okay, I'm gonna go back to my comics now, and continue chuckling gleefully. I LOVE it when super-hero comics are funny.

7 comments:

Duskdog said...

Awesome issue. I haven't laughed so hard at the main GL title in ages.

Who the heck would want their own Guardian? Those guys are probably really high-maintenance, and hard to potty-train.

I can't believe it's tempting him with Guardians and hamburgers when everyone knows Hal really only wants hot space chicks.

MetFanMac said...

"It's in MINT CONDITION!"

*WANGG*

"You've got to be kidding me."

Hey, Mr. Didio! You see this? THIS is how comics are SUPPOSED to be!! FUN!!!


PS - Am I the only hearing Don LaFontaine as the voice of the Orange Power Battery?

Saranga said...

Brilliant! Are they all this funny?

Kevin T. said...

"It cleans! It shines! It chops off your enemy's hands off!"

That is just priceless.

SallyP said...

Great, now I'm going to read Larfleeze, and picture him with Billy May's voice.

I'm torn between giggling like mad at this issue, and howling with outrage at the rotten trick the Guardians pulled at the end.

Sea-of-Green said...

The last time I remember Green Lantern being this funny was during the Star Sapphire storyline from a couple of years ago. I think this story tops that one, though!

Kandou Erik said...

I loved this story arch. The Orange Lantern Corps is now my most favorite of all the colors.

Any collector can instantly sympathize with Agent Orange.

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